Steam
by hyperbole77
Summary: The worst day of Sirius Black's life. The day he finds/loses love and family. One-Shot


**A/N: I wrote this story way back in 2007, and recently got some new inspiration to bring the story more depth. I submitted it for the Miserable Melody competition. While the story focuses on the relationship between Sirius and the O/C, I like to think that what makes August 1 the most miserable day are events that he hasn't found out about yet.. **

**Steam**

_Beauty Queen of only 18  
>She had some trouble with herself<br>He was always there to help her  
>She always belonged to someone else.<em>

It had all started with that night. The sky was raging war with the asphalt, the droplets of precipitation used as artillery. The asphalt used its many colors to burn the rain into inexistence. Instead of explosions and gunfire, the natural silence was polluted with soft pitter-pattering as the rain collided with the still water of the pool, steam rising up from the surface instead of smoke.

July had just pushed June into the past. As the clock struck midnight, it was officially the first day of July; July 1, 1978.

She was talking about some guy. There was always 'some guy' in her life. She went for the prissy types; the ones who were constantly trying to impress daddy and all of his ministry pals. I could instantly pick them out in a crowd. Their robes were perfectly tailored to fit their bodies, and, mind you, they only wore the best brands of robes. And we can't forget about their hair; perfectly parted on the side and combed down, with no strands allowed to go astray. It made me want to puke.

To these guys, Jade was the perfect show girlfriend. She was – God – breathtakingly beautiful. She had this curly black hair that would bounce along with her cheerful steps, and these eyes that had more shades of blue than I thought existed. And she was brilliant. You'd never know this unless you were intimately close with her, because she didn't like to show it. She graduated 4th in our class from Hogwarts.

She was also completely and utterly insane.

That night she apparated into my living room, interrupted my nap, and declared that I'd better get my ass off the couch and put my swim suit on because we were going swimming.

"What the fuck are you going on about…" I'd muttered, repositioning myself so as to ignore her better.

"Please, Si."

I remembered forcing myself to get up when I recognized the catch in her throat. "What'd he do now?"

As she went on an angry rampage about the horrible things her boyfriend did, I'd pulled on a pair of jeans and followed her to my back door, which lead to the community pool that was often left vacant. This was largely due to the fact that none of the muggles who bought into this community were under the age of 75. I liked the quiet. But I clearly wasn't going to be left in peace tonight.

"Jade!" I'd interrupted as I caught sight of a window for the first time, "its pouring!"

"So? I'm already wet and I really need some fresh air. I think I'm going to burst! I can't deal with him anymore!"

"That's what you said the last time." Yet, I'd opened the door to let her pass.

"No, I really mean it this time!"

We had walked along the flooding sidewalk and within two strides my socks began to slosh and slush in my shoes. I quickly ditched them, along with the rest of my clothing. Jade began to undress as well, still talking rapidly.

"And I'm just so sick of his crap! I mean who does he think he is? Fuck!"

"Dump him, then."

"I know! I mean he acts all innocent like he has no idea what he's saying. And his sister, did I tell you about her? God, I swear she thinks I'm gunna milk him for all he's worth, which, between you and I, is nowhere near as much as he lets on."

I stopped listening, then. Every time it was the same.

Sooner or later she'd break it off with the guy, and within a week she'd be on to someone new. She would come to my house and proclaim that she met the "love of her life". I would point out that she's said this before, and she would snap back that "this time, it's different. This is for real".

It made me want to scream.

Then, the idiot would break her heart and she'd end up at my place, making me swim with her at 3am.

I flicked the pool lights on, which cast an eerie glow under the surface of the water. I hated swimming at night. I felt like one of those small fish trapped in the depths of the ocean, waiting for the larger fish to prey on them.

Jade preferred to swim under the cover of darkness.

She moved to the side of the pool and gracefully dove in. I watched her for a moment with a smile on my face. She splashed around like a little kid, doing a backflip under the water. I ran and aimed my cannonball right next to her, causing a wave to engulf her.

She laughed, a glint in her eye as she shoved me and scolded me for my irresponsible pool etiquette.

We swam down to the shallow end. She started up again about whats-his-face as I leaned casually against the side.

"I just… shit, Sirius, I dunno what to do."

"Break up with him."

"It's not that easy…"

"Sure it is."

"What would I say?"

" 'Go screw with someone else.'"

"Hah, Hah."

"Or what about, 'I'm screwing someone else.'"

"Come on, Sirius, be serious."

And that's when I had kissed her. A little peck at first, but then I really drove it home. Looking back, I don't know what made me do it. Her hair was wet and stringy, her mascara had gotten in her eyes and was making them blood-shot, her bathing suit exposed the unflattering contours of her stomach she usually disguised, and I knew that nobody else would love her like I did at that moment. And god-damn it, she kissed me back.

So, why did I come home a week later to my single-storied white-walled home to find her sitting on my black leather couch, immediately telling me about the guy she'd just met at Gringotts? What, did she forget?

And I let her walk away with the impression that I was happy for her. As soon as the door closed behind her, I headed immediately to the liquor cabinet and added two shots of Rum to my coke, preparing myself to spend the night alone.

It took me a whole week to sober up and come to the conclusion that this was a test. She was testing me to see if I would end up like one of those guys.

So what did I do? I cleaned up real nice and apparated into her living room and walked right up to her, in front of who I assume was the Gringotts guy, and I kissed her - long and deep. She stood there shocked, and he punched me.

I apparated home, and doubled the shots of rum in my coke.

I napped until the following afternoon, drowsed by my own despair and the alcohol running through my system. The good guy never wins. I went on for a week like that - sleeping during the day, drinking rum and cokes into the night. My friends would stop by and tell me to get off of the freaking couch but I always refused. My best mate's girlfriend, Lily, even came by and poured coffee down my pants in an attempt to snap me out of my despair. But it was to no avail.

Then, August first arrived. An entire month since the day I'd kissed her. I thought it might be a good idea to shower, and when I returned to my loyal couch, who was I to see sitting there but her. She had tears in her eyes, and her hair was a mess.

"Sirius, Jonathan and I are over."

"Fan-bloody-tastic."

She sniffed and turned away, and I immediately regretted my coldness, despite all she had put me through.

"Si…" She turned around and ran to me, kissing me hard and with need.

Here was my moment. She was in my arms, not pushing me away.

But what do I do? I pushed her away. "I won't be your rebound." The hurt in her eyes didn't cause me as much pain as I thought. Maybe that was because it was the same hurt that was there after those other losers broke her heart. There was nothing more, nothing less. _I_ was nothing more.

I left the living room and entered the kitchen to get away from her.

I noticed a photo dropped off the day before of my godson, Harry, riding around on the toy broomstick I had ordered and had delivered to his home before the Jade fiasco.

I smiled as I watched him and realized something. All this time I'd been laying around feeling sorry for myself, the closest people I'd have to family had been in hiding.

There was a fucking war going on.

Images I hadn't processed from the Daily Prophet flooded my mind. The McKinnons were dead. Voldemort was growing stronger. James. Lily. Harry.

"Si…" Jade's soft and sensuous voice was hot against my ear as she wrapped her arms around me and tenderly kissed right below my ear. "Don't be mad at me. I realized you're the one I'm meant to be with. I love you"

I folded the picture and put it in the pocket of my jeans.

_I don't mind spending everyday  
>Out on your corner in the pouring rain<br>Look for the girl with the broken smile  
>Ask her if she wants to stay awhile<br>And she will be loved_

I turned to face her, and kissed her slowly, savoring every second. My body came alive as we stood there frozen in time. I knew she didn't really love me as I loved her. But I realized that maybe that was okay. In these uncertain times, nobody wanted to be alone.

A dozen large cracks sounded outside of the door, and the air grew suddenly chill and lifeless.

_Please don't try so hard to say goodbye_


End file.
